The crush of September is upon us. Kids are going back to school. The perceived freedoms of summer are gone. We start to become more focused on work and responsibility. I hear about this every day. As I sit with people, I hear more stories of being overwhelmed and under rested.
Let’s Get Messy
So many people start a therapy process because they want real change. They want to change their relationship, their place in the world, their ability to cope with the things that stress them. People don’t want a band-aid, they want to experience a different way of being. When therapy is great, that is what people can experience.
A Moment for Pause
Today the United States Supreme Court handed down a ruling that stated that marriage is no longer permitted to be solely between one man and one woman in this country. When the news hit the wires, I was in that rare moment between clients when I get to see what is actually happening in the outside world beyond the safe confines of my room. My browser exploded with messages from friends, family and colleagues about their reactions to this moment.
Sometimes I Forget…
There are times when I forget. I forget that I can do something. I forget that I have the power to influence and create change. I forget that I have coping skills. And, when I forget any of these things, I also forget how to find meaning and perspective. I lose myself in the chaos and noise and see my skills begin to erode away. When this happens the most important thing I can do is recenter myself, find my core and listen to the inner voice that guides me. This challenge is often resolved when I find a labyrinth and walk with intention.
Lessons From a 6 Year Old
The other day I was discussing the emotional toll of fighting and hurt in intimate relationships with some folks. We were talking about what happens after the fight. You know…when we have apologized, we know that it is time to move on and there is nothing more to process, but you still feel yucky inside.
Hey Sexy!: Talking About Sex
I often will ask people basic questions very early on in my work with them, “So, how did you learn about sex? Who taught you?” The answers I get back are usually akin to “My friends.” “Nobody taught me, I learned by myself.” “TV, the Internet, porn.” “Experimentation”. Then I ask, “What messages did you get about sex?” The answers to that question are more widespread and diverse. Some are positive. Some are negative. Some are accurate. Some are not!