My husband and I know we will be parents. We’ve thought a lot about how we would parent, with a vague knowledge that all of it would probably go out the window when we were faced with reality – but we hadn’t really thought about how we would become parents. Frankly, as a heterosexual couple, we thought it would be easy.
Bringing a new baby into the family is an exciting time. We celebrate the newness of life and have hope for the future. People are curious about the delivery and the birth story. Parents are excited and siblings are cautious (at best).
Trying to have a baby through third party reproduction is a challenging and emotional process. What makes it even more complicated is that you have to learn a whole new language before you can really make sense of the journey you are about to undertake. Whether you are going through assisted reproduction to create a baby yourselves or need the assistance of others to grow your family, you will need to have some basic knowledge.
What do you do when you have the thing you want the most and you should be happy but you are miserable? How do you respond when everyone tells you that you “must be so happy!” and you really just want to lie in your bed with the blinds closed? You know….those moments that you sit there and think, “I can’t wait for this to be over!”
As small children we role play as adults. We are explorers, teachers, doctors, police officers, presidents. Most often we are mommies and daddies. Children are socialized from the earliest moments to aspire to be like their parents and have children of their own. Occasionally, as children grow up to adults, they decide that they don’t want children, and that is a fine decision. However, for those that want children and have difficulty having them, it is a devastating reality.
If you are a gay man, woman or couple who is considering adding children to your life, this is an exciting time! There are more and more examples of gay men and women who are becoming parents through methods other than through previous heterosexual relationships. How to achieve this dream, can be overwhelming without a lot of information and forethought.