Monogamy is like the color yellow

When I start working with a new couple or individual around relationship concerns I often begin by asking them what their relationship goals are.  Most, but not all, will tell me that they are just looking for a nice, loving, monogamous relationship.  They say that like I am supposed to know what that means — and I don’t.  Not that I am clueless, but rather because I know that there is more than one meaning to the word monogamous. 

Learning to say goodbye

My grandmother always told me that it was the greatest honor to be with someone when they took their first breath and when they took their last breath.  She was a very wise woman.  However, when managing this whole life and death journey, the life part seems infinitely easier and full of joy and we dread the death part, preparing ourselves for a journey of great sorrow, guilt and loneliness.  But, it doesn’t have to be that way.

Making Connections

You know those times when you are getting frustrated in your relationship because you just aren’t getting your needs met? You keep telling your partner that you want things (sex, communication, warmth, etc.) and feel like your requests are falling on deaf ears?  Frustration creeps in and you start losing stake in the relationship feeling that your connection is more distant and fractured. 

The 5 C’s of Change

Building a house, changing a career, making a plan – all of these require a certain focus and approach in order to be successful. It is also critical to remember that these shifts and changes don’t happen in moment nor do they rely on just one factor. It is often most challenging to make real lasting change when there isn’t a plan and strategy to support the growth. So many people will attempt change and then give up when the results are not immediately gratifying.