I Really Don’t Need Your Help!

So often couples come to see me in great frustration because each partner thinks the other is trying to fix them or control them.  This behavior comes out in a variety of ways… often intended to be helpful or focused on making the relationship better.  However, it often results in anger and disconnect.  Partners report feeling misunderstood and begin to feel justified when their helping ways are questioned.  They say things like “If you would only listen to me…” and “I told you so…” and “Don’t feel that way baby….”

Football changed my life!: Boundaries, Preferences and Behaviors

There has been a common theme going in much of the work I have been doing with couples of late.  I am hearing folks coming in talking about how their partner responds to them in a way that makes them feel emotionally assaulted.  Often, these couples are well intentioned, loving, and looking for connection but for some reason they are having arguments that do not make sense.