I Really Don’t Need Your Help!

So often couples come to see me in great frustration because each partner thinks the other is trying to fix them or control them.  This behavior comes out in a variety of ways… often intended to be helpful or focused on making the relationship better.  However, it often results in anger and disconnect.  Partners report feeling misunderstood and begin to feel justified when their helping ways are questioned.  They say things like “If you would only listen to me…” and “I told you so…” and “Don’t feel that way baby….”